I really thought that 2013 was going to be my year. The year where I don't hurt or embarrass myself. I was WRONG. The year started off with a bang...literally, like a huge bang when I backed into my garage door. I don't get how it always happens to me, I truly don't. I look in my sideviews, see the door is no longer in my sights, back up, and bang, boom, scratch, screech, d*mn, sh*t is all I hear. The latter part of that sentence coming out of my mouth. I apologize for my crude language, but it's really all I could get out. Since Andrew and I have gotten married, I have been trying to talk him into letting me sell Tina the Torrent and buying a beater car and/or driving his work truck. Why do I want to sell this forsaken car you ask?? You may remember our little run in last May when Tina took it upon herself to run me over. We have a bad, bad relationship and I feel it's time to part ways. This latest incident only adds fuel to my already large fire.
Then there is the incident that happened 2 weekends ago.....the one where I was leading a group of our friends to the next bar. I saw a huge gap in the sidewalk, so I do what any nice person would do. I turn around to tell them to watch out for this said "gap." As I was telling them, I was still walking and hit yet another gap in the sidewalk sending me flying to the ground. Not only was I in front of a group of people I know well, I was on a sidewalk that ran through downtown Evansville where there are multiple cars at any given time. It all happened in slow motion in my head. I came out of it with a stubbed up toe, bruised knee, and a cut on my hand. It's a good thing I took that tetanus shot they offered back in may when I had my close call! After these major incidents and a few smaller ones, one would think that my luck will run out and things will calm down a bit. Wrong.....
Speed up to today....I go into work early today because I have a dentist appointment at 2. I rush home to let my precious pups out and to throw dinner in the crockpot....as I run out into the garage to grab the rest of the stuff to throw in the crockpot, I lock myself out of my house. Not a huge deal right because normal people would have a hide a key or their cell phone handy....well NOT ME! My car was locked, my car keys were locked in the house, and that cell phone I should have had was in my car, which was again locked! As my luck would have it, we have a house phone in our garage...I was saved!!! I could call my parents or my in-laws to rescue me, but whoa is me, the phone is dead!!! I let it charge enough to call my father who I think is at the farm, only for him to tell me I'm 80 miles from home...I can't help....the phone is beeping, it's going dead, what am I to do? In rapid speed I tell my dad pleasecallmyhusbandthephoneisgoingdeadandIcan'tgettomycellphoneandIdon'tknowhowIamgoingtogettomyappointment andmyhusbandisgoingtobemadpleasejusthelpme......bless my daddy, he understood everyword.....called my husband, husband called me...not enthused at all, was able to talk for .5 seconds before the phone died....mother in law leaves a meeting just to unlock my door...and I am 20 minutes late to my dentist appointment, thank jesus they are all understanding....however I did receive a few smirks and giggles when I walked into the door, because yes I explained my situation completely. Because this couldn't really happen to anyone else on a nearly daily basis.
Between all this larger incidents there are the daily incidents of tripping over my own feet, getting caught up in my words and sounding like I have no idea what I am talking about, and the overall general klutziness that seems to follow me like the plague.
I am so glad my husband found me when he did, I was having a good year, little to no accidents/injuries; however I'm just hoping he thinks I am worth it to keep around after this past year! haha
I really, truly am amazed at how often I hurt myself or something or do something silly like locking myself out of my own house. It has to take a special talent to pull these shenanigans off.
Now I'm wishing I would have saved my ww points, skipped the cheesecake, just so I could enjoy a glass of wine after my afternoon....
